February 11, 2013

this has been a week of self-discovery. i`m not sure if you`ve ever gotten so caught up in a project for school or work, or become obsorbed in something someone asked you to do...i feel like that`s happened to me. don`t get me wrong, i LOVE being a missionary. i truly do. i`ve just had some experiences lately that have made me realize that in all my efforts to obey, to learn, to love, to help, to serve, to progress, i`ve been STRESSING myself out, and have become very impatient with myself. i`ve lost sight of my own potential, and that my father in heaven is helping me get there, but that it`s a PROCESS. 

this morning i read the talk "forget me not" by elder uchtdorf, and was touched once again by these words:

"god wants to help us to eventually turn all of our weaknesses into strengths, but he knows that it is a long-term goal. he wants us to become perfect, and if we stay on the path of discipleship, one day we will. it`s ok that you`re not quite there yet. keep working on it, but stop punishing yourself."

somewhere along the line i forgot that IT`S OK TO MAKE MISTAKES! that`s part of the plan! that`s WHY the savior came to earth, to atone for those mistakes and make it possible to progress and reach my eternal potential. but that`s the thing: i have an eternity to figure this out! my companion remindde me the other day that if i had to fix all of my imperfections here in the mission, what would be the point of life afterwards? i`ve got a lot to fix, but i`m not alone. i`ve got time. the lord is patient. these words were in my head all week: "be still, and know that i am god"

i know that my father loves me, and that he will help me through this process. i love the gospel. the mission truly is fun, when i remember to RELAX and ENJOY it!! DUH! 

family, please find joy in the journey. life`s just too short.

lots of love,

sophia